Stop it, Hannah.

Seriously, dude. You know what's not hard? Yeah, it's not hard to finish things, like blog entries.
And you know what else isn't hard? Writing good, nay, writing well; writing well is not hard for someone who kicked the butts of pretty much every other senior in 2007 in the Boone County school system when it came to writing on demand and all that. Dominated. But do I show off these particular skill sets? Absolutely not. I suck at the internet all the time.
Back in the day I kept a xanga every single freaking day like it was my job. It was, because I didn't have a job.
But now? Now? Never, ever. Blogs are so boring (though, I read everyone else's ever, it seems,) I never finish anything.

I've been jogging. I've been listening to the same stupid playlist for weeks.
I'm trying to pull an all nighter in the pr. I'm not sure if I've able anymore. At least now I can make a coffee run if I need to. QT may or may not be calling my name.

it's very cold in here.
I didn't bring my computer cord.
damn.

the other night I was at walmart buying pancake mix and pasta salad (obviously) and I saw this kid that I used to have the same prayer room hours as last fall. He is decently cute, has dark hair and glasses, and wore toms before it was pretty much an awkward ihop staple. I appreciated that. anyhow, saw him at walmart, and we made eye contact (ihop dudes have issues with making unnecessary, if not excessive eye contact) and I smiled that ‘oh, I see you all the time, but we don’t know each other’ smile. he almost ran into something, he blushed. we kept passing each other and he would look down as hard as he could. I felt terrible! I am mostly, in life in general, the most awkward person alive, so thusly I felt his pain. 
we even were parked near each other and left at similar times, he walked very slowly behind me and a long way to his car; I want to tell him, it’s okay, I am so awkward, I feel ya, and don’t be awkward, be friends! but I don’t, because that would be weird of me, seeing as we’ve never spoken.
tonight, feeling halfway grouchy, I went to chick-fil-a, to redeem a coupon kim gave me for a free sandwich and get myself, you know, waffle fries. when I get to the window they were all out of order (I feel that too,) and the person at the window is all jumbled and another guy has stepped up quite confidently to help him out. The confident guy’s confidence, as it were, faded when he leaned out and asked me what my order was, and  to be honest the quiver in his voice kind of flattered me being as I seem to have this effect on him, as it was poor awkward (decently cute) glasses kid who I used to have prayer room hours with.

He regained his composure and squeaked (poor kid) “Our orders got a little out of …. order…” I smiled “It’s totally cool,” I say, poor guy doesn’t even know how much I mean it, I know drive thrus and how much they suck, and I know awkward. These are two of the most common things in my life! One time I was even told in the drive thru at starbucks that I was so awkward it was making my coworker uncomfortable! (I mean, that’s because she is kind of a bitch not very nice person, but whatev) When my order is figured out he gives me my total…which wasn’t actually the same total I was originally given (it was off by like 30 cents, I was told by the guy & the screen 4.57, he said 4.87…) but it was okay, I wasn’t giving them exact change, I had him a five, and he says “Th-thanks.” and hands me my change saying “And your total comes to, um, …. forty three cents…” he is pale and blushes easily, as am I so I really just find it endearing. The look of relief on his face as he says “Here you are, have a great night!” without any problems was priceless.

I either terrify him or he has a crush on me. I’m flattered either way I suppose.