nonsense

I want to know why the Lord has made my heart to ache and need relationships with people the way that I do; I've always had such a deep rooted need for friendship and communion with people, but I'm afraid that because of this I've had so much attack in this area.

My whole life I've had a friend I could count on (an earthly, person friend, this is a post about that, not just an open-ended question to fill in 'Jesus' in the blank) to talk to, to be on the same page. I've had the most tiffs and disagreements with her, but time has been good to us.

On the other hand I've had rich, intense friendships that only last blips and spurts and have hurt me a lot.

At the moment I am fighting pain so hard because things are overlapping and I'm fearing g forgotten by the only person in my life who hadn't yet, and being deserted for a newer model. I'm feeling so alone I can't even stand it. I need the Lord to help me get through this, and I know that, but it's still been so hard.
and I can't tell anyone. Because there's no one there anymore.

Pray for me.